The Flu Shot...

But, the computer says I have to...

While I love the fall, and miss the scenic drives through the Shenandoah valley during this time of year, I hate --- HATE --- that autumn marks the annual arm stabbing from the US Navy and the blessed flu shot.  And, yes, as an active duty servicemember, I have no choice; I am required to get it.  Every year, I push it off.  And, every year, I am hounded by the bean counters whose sole job is to make sure that all in the Navy are in compliance.

A few years ago, I was about to sneak under this flu shot radar.  I had been on frequent travel during the flu season, and, through neglect, laziness, or apathy, no MP ever came knocking on my door, with syringe in hand.  I felt that I had un-stuck it to the man.

I was wrong.

In late June of the next year, I was transferring jobs and had to complete the standard scavenger hunt of checklists, paperwork, and records.  The last item to complete before I moved was the almighty medical screening.  With my medical record in hand, I worked with a nurse, who dutifully pulled up her computer and scanned my electronic file.  She looked befuddled:

Nurse:  Sir, it says here that you didn't get a flu shot.
Me:  That's correct.  I didn't get a flu shot last year.  I was on travel, and by the time I got back, I didn't bother.
Nurse:  but, the computer says that you need a flu shot.
Me:  I understand.  But, I always get sick when you guys give me that shot, so...I don't think it's necessary.
Nurse: But, the computer...
Me:  *sigh*  Can I speak to your supervisor?
Supervisor:  Sir, I understand that you don't want to get the flu shot.
Me:  That is correct.   
Supervisor: Well, you need to get a flu shot.
Me:  OK.   Before you go grab the orderly, let's be reasonable.
Supervisor: *blink blink*
Me: Flu season is when?
Supervisor: ...
Me:  It's from Sep - March, right?
Supervisor: ...
Me: And, we're in the summer now?  So, we're not even in the flu season.
Supervisor: ...
Me: And, the vaccine is created before flu season, right?  So, we're talking about a strain that is probably almost a year old.
Supervisor:  ...
Me: And you want to inject me with this now?  After flu season, with an old vaccine?
Supervisor:  Sir, the computer says...

At this point, I weighed the options of speaking to yet another medical bureaucrat and going through the above wrangling -- again.  I just wanted to leave.  I relented.  I gave them my left arm.  They stuck me with the old strain.  By the next morning, I was sick.  With the flu.

Since that date, I have given up the fight. While I may prolong the day of my flu vaccination, I dutifully comply.  In fact, yesterday I got the latest and greatest from Navy medicine.

This morning I feel sick...